星期三, 五月 21, 2008

男人和女人的英文

友人介紹的笑話

WOMEN'S ENGLISH:
Yes = No.

No = Yes.

Maybe = Hell no.

We need = I want.

I'm sorry = You'll be sorry.

We need to talk = I need to complain.

Sure, go ahead = I don't want you to.

Do what you want = You'll pay for this later.

I'm not upset = Of course I'm upset, you moron!

Are you listening to me?? = Too late, you're dead.

You have to learn to communicate = Just agree with me.

Be romantic, turn out the lights = I have flabby thighs.

You're so .. manly = You need a shave and you sweat a lot.

Do you love me? = I'm going to ask for something expensive.

It's your decision = The correct decision should be obvious by now.

I'll be ready in a minute = Kick off your shoes and find a good game on TV.

How much do you love me? = I did something today that you're really not going to like.


MEN'S ENGLISH:
I'm hungry = I'm hungry.

I'm sleepy = I'm sleepy.

I'm tired = I'm tired.

Nice dress = Nice cleavage!

I love you = Let's have sex now.

What's wrong? = I guess sex is out of the question.

May I have this dance? = I'd like to have sex with you.

Can I call you sometime? = I'd like to have sex with you.

Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd like to have sex with you.

Can I take you out to dinner? = I'll take you to a nice restaurant and then I'd like to have sex with you.

Will you marry me? = I want to make it illegal for you to have sex with other guys.

You look tense, let me give you a massage = I want to have sex with you within the next ten minutes.

Let's talk = I am trying to impress you by showing that I am a deep person and then I'd like to have sex with you.

7 条评论:

老妖 说...

hmmm...

若我的英文進步,狼老師你功勞最大..

Angie Leo 说...

男人的脑子~~~ 哈哈!

均均 说...

男人的第五行开始都有相同的字。"having sex"

DolphinE 说...

哈哈~写得很贴切。。。
还可以练习下英语!哈哈

胡狼 说...

老妖:哈哈,我絕對不可能做你老師,我英文應該比你差很多

angie:哈哈,女生的也說得很對啊 XD

均均:男人嘛

dolphine:哈哈,男女的都說得很貼切 XD

1hui麦小慧 说...

男人果真的是用下半身思考的动物~

偷走你这篇了xD

coco 说...
此评论已被博客管理员删除。